I know a friend who does all kinds of cards. He has gotten a lot of suggestions for the messages to print on Mother’s Day cards. There are a lot of good ones, but some have “limited market size”, and some are just ridiculous for the celebration of Mother’s Day. He wanted to share some of these with others. So, here we are:

Top Ten Rejected Mother’s Day Card Messages

10: I wish you a happy Mother’s Day, and dad wishes you gave him more allowance.

9: I inherited so much from you. By the way, people say I am ugly.

8: You’re my inspiration! If you were good at cooking then I would have no motivation to become the best chef!

7: I still love you even though you shot dad.

6: Surprise! You’ve got a gastric bypass as your Mother’s Day present!

5: I wish every day is Mother’s Day. That’s the day you whine least.

4: Why is my surname Chan but I look so much like Uncle Lee?

3: When in doubt, ask yourself: “What would Victor do?”

2: Dear mom, sometimes I wish you became a lesbian before I was born, not after.

And the #1 rejected Mother’s Day card message:
1: Now you are a man, I still celebrate with you on Mother’s Day rather than Father’s Day.

All right, mothers, I hope your sons and daughters have better messages than these. Happy Mother’s Day!